Joe/Stories
Quotes
Adventurer Story Episodes
The Fire's Fletcher
Euden: Hmm.
Euden: The town is eerily quiet today...
Ranzal: Yeah. Ya can see people peekin' out from their windows, though.
Joe: You folks travelers?
Ranzal: You could say that. Who's askin'?
Joe: Name's Joe, but some call me the fire's fletcher.
Joe: You guys probably want to find somewhere to hide soon.
Ranzal: And what am I hidin' from, exactly?
Joe: Thugs from the next town over. They're holed up in an eatery with a hostage.
Euden: What?!
Joe: It started as a petty squabble. Horse kicked mud on one guy's coat or something like that. Pretty trite stuff, honestly.
Ranzal: How in the heck does a dirty coat turn into a hostage situation?
Joe: Turns out the young owner of the mud-flinging horse is a local bigwig.
Joe: Things went south fast for the accuser, and he got desperate.
Euden: Well, that was clearly the wrong move. Either way, we need to help stop this.
Joe: Easy, friend. They're probably starting to see things with clear heads about now.
Ranzal: You thinkin' they'll let the hostage go? Turn themselves in?
Joe: And let themselves get arrested and charged in THIS town? Not a chance.
Joe: No, right about now they're asking themselves how many people they can take with them.
Ranzal: So why are ya standin' around when this thing's about to boil over?!
Joe: That's exactly why I'm keeping a cool head. Stand back and watch.
Joe: Their kind's not known for their patience. They'll come out soon enough.
Thug A: If they want us, they can come get us!
Thug A: You better hope they bring a bucket so they can pick up all your pieces, rich boy!
Noble: P-please, no!
Ranzal: Well look at that. Right on cue.
Joe: ...Hnf.
Thugs: Gragh!
Noble: It serves you right!
Joe: That takes care of that.
Euden: You routed them all?!
Ranzal: I barely saw a thing. Those arrows came outta nowhere!
Joe: ...You're Eduen, right?
Euden: You've heard of me?
Joe: Heard the rumors, yeah. Sounds like you're having a pretty wild time of it.
Joe: Guess there's no harm in asking. You in the market for a bodyguard?
Euden: I don't know that I have need of a guard, but if you're offering to fight for our cause, we'd love to have you.
Ranzal: Just make sure ya know what yer signin' on for.
Ranzal: We see a lot more action than yer average knightly order. ...Lot worse, too.
Joe: Music to my ears. I wouldn't have it any other way.
Euden: Oh?
Joe: A guy needs his thrills, yeah?
Joe: And putting my life on the line is just the kinda thrill I'm looking for.
The Fletcher's True Talent
Euden: Sorry to ask this of you, but we found a fiend nest near the castle. Would you mind helping us clear it out?
Joe: Sorry? That's the best news I've heard all week! I've been itching to see some action.
Elisanne: Wait. Are you certain he's capable?
Euden: Oh, he'll be fine. I can vouch for his skill with a bow firsthand.
Joe: You want a demonstration too, babe?
Elisanne: I am no babe. I'm a grown woman with little patience for rude men.
Joe: Whoa there, milady. I misspoke. Apologies if I offended.
Elisanne: ...Hmph.
Joe: Hey, Eduen. Got a minute?
Euden: I believe so. How long do you need?
Joe: Oh, just long enough to convince this nice lady I can carry my weight around here.
Joe: It's Elisanne, right?
Joe: How about you point to a tree and I'll feather it for you. Go on, take your pick.
Elisanne: ...Very well. It's a bit far, but let's see you hit that branch there.
Elisanne: Land an arrow within three attempts and I'll consider it a passing grade.
Joe: That branch there? Hmm, it's awful thin... You're not making this easy on me.
Elisanne: Then it sounds like we're done here. You save your arrows, and we'll both save ourselves the time.
Joe: Aw, come on now, give me a chance.
Joe: ...That the right branch?
Euden: I...think?
Euden: It's a little hard to say when you sent the whole tree flying.
Joe: Oh, I hit it. Trust me, I don't miss.
Elisanne: Now hold on just a moment. How does an ARROW send a TREE soaring through the air?!
Elisanne: And why was the arrow on FIRE?! What manner of trickery is this?!
Joe: There's no tricks to it, your ladyship— just my blastfire bow. Guess you could say it's my trademark.
Euden: Ha ha! I can see why!
Euden: See, Elly? He's good to go.
Elisanne: H-hrmmm... My apologies for doubting you.
Elisanne: You're clearly quite skilled, Joe.
Joe: Just glad I'm up to your standards, ma'am. I wouldn't want to slow you down.
Joe: Now, shall we? I'm eager to aim my bow at something other than a tree.
The Smell of Baked Bread
Elisanne: Are you not hungry, Joe? The bread is done baking.
Joe: Mmm, my nose was just saying the very same thing.
Joe: Mind if I hang back and enjoy this smell awhile longer?
Elisanne: Of course! You must really be a fan of the smell of fresh-baked bread.
Joe: No, but my old rival was.
Joe: Now every time I catch a whiff of it, I remember him.
Elisanne: I take it he's no longer with us?
Joe: Afraid not. I sent him to the other side myself, in a duel.
Elisanne: A duel? What cause demanded such extreme measures?
Joe: First, you've gotta understand that the top archer in the world was a god among men to the rest of us bow slingers.
Joe: So my rival and I dueled for the right to challenge him.
Elisanne: You fought to the death over something so trivial?! ...I shall never understand men.
Joe: Believe me, there are days I don't get it myself.
Joe: Anyhow, for a month leading up to the big day, my rival and I lived together.
Elisanne: What?! You ate and slept with a man you planned on killing? Why?
Joe: Can't rightly say. Guess all I can tell you is we were both curious.
Joe: He was the sort who'd take any paying job. To most folks, he was a monster. But I was happy that whole month.
Elisanne: Happy living alongside a monster?
Elisanne: You must have known death could come at any moment.
Joe: Oh sure, he could've betrayed me anytime he wanted. Same goes for me.
Joe: But along the way, the tension and fear turned into joy, and I... Well, I kinda fell in love with the guy.
Elisanne: Is this how all men work?
Euden: You two still haven't eaten? Go get it while it's warm.
Joe: Thanks, I'll go help myself. 'Scuse me, ma'am.
The Thrill Has Chilled
Euden: Are you busy, Joe?
Joe: My day's wide open—just watch where you step.
Joe: Got all my tools laid out how I like them.
Euden: Getting some bow maintenance in?
Joe: Yep. You'll have to help me with a few test shots later.
Euden: Sure. What is it that you'd need me to do?
Joe: Just sit pretty with an apple on your head.
Euden: And you...shoot the apple?
Euden: I can't say I see a reason why it has to be sitting on my head.
Joe: Hey, who am I to argue with tradition? Just lemme check the tension on this new string I put on...
Joe: Question for you, Eduen.
Joe: What would you do if I was an assassin here to kill you?
Euden: I'd think you must be charging by the hour, because you're certainly in no hurry.
Euden: I'd also think you've not taken on an easy task. I don't die easy.
Joe: Okay, fair. But what about right now? At this very moment?
Joe: When you walked in here, you didn't think for a second I'd kill you?
Euden: I don't usually suspect my allies of wanting to kill me. I'd never get a moment's rest if I did.
Joe: True.
Joe: And that takes care of this bowstring. Now, let's go find that apple.
Euden: I'm afraid I won't be wearing any food for you, Joe. Fruit or otherwise.
Joe: Aw, c'mon. Say, you know your way around a bow, right?
Euden: Enough to know that you aim, draw, and release, anyway.
Joe: Great. First apple goes on my head, then. See if you can pierce it.
Euden: Wait, I'M the one shooting now?!
Joe: Relax, I won't stand too far. With a close enough target, even an amateur won't miss. Most of the time, anyway.
Euden: You're not exactly selling this hallowed tradition of yours.
Euden: Besides, what if your talk of assassins has got me paranoid?
Euden: What if now I'm questioning whether I can trust you? What if I decide to put an arrow in you before you put one in me?
Joe: Care to give it a shot and see?
Euden: No!
Euden: You're a friend and an ally. I'm not going to shoot you!
Euden: When you said you were after thrills, is this what you had in mind?
Euden: Because it's sounding a lot like you've just got a death wish.
Joe: You'll be surprised to know that's not the first time someone's said that to me.
Joe: But it's not about dying or living.
Joe: I've been through plenty of life-or-death battles before.
Joe: I've threaded a hailstorm of arrows... Ducked beneath a charging beast...
Joe: Those are the moments you feel the white-hot flood of life through your veins.
Joe: The rest of the time I'm half-asleep, bored out of my head.
Euden: But one wrong move, and it's all over.
Euden: Just because you've eluded death so far doesn't mean your next encounter won't also be your last.
Joe: So it's the last. I'm not afraid of dying.
Euden: ...I am. I can't wrap my head around your way of thinking.
Joe: Why be afraid? You're throwing yourself headlong into the fire here, too.
Joe: What's so scary about dying?
Euden: I still have things I have to do here.
Euden: I can't afford to die now. That's why every battle is terrifying.
Joe: ......
Euden: You don't have a dream, Joe?
Euden: The sort of thing you'd regret passing up if you died?
Joe: A dream, huh?
Joe: Heh... Forgot mine a long time ago.
The Burden of Caring
Fiend: Grrrrrrr!
Euden: Rgh, just my luck to run into a pack of fiends alone...
Euden: I'll just have to cut my way out!
Euden: It caught my sword in its TEETH?!
Fiend: GrrrrRAWR!
Euden: My blade bounced off its hide?! I can't—
Fiend: Graoourgh?!
Euden: What?! A single arrow took them all out?! The blastfire bow... Joe?!
Joe: You all right?!
Joe: Honestly, you can't take two steps out the door without walking into some kinda trouble. It's a real pain, ya know?
Euden: My apologies, and thank you! A moment longer, and I'd have ended up lunch.
Joe: What were you thinking, Eduen? I thought you were afraid of dying.
Joe: Why walk around without a guard?
Euden: I was just... No, you're right. I have no excuse except carelessness.
Euden: I'll tread more lightly from now on.
Euden: You were amazing as ever, though.
Euden: You took down the entire pack in the blink of an eye!
Euden: ...Joe? Is everything okay? Your hand's shaking.
Joe: ...I was afraid.
Euden: Huh?
Joe: Thinking I might be too late and you might be dead... My draw hand went jittery.
Joe: I've lived on the road alone ever since I left home.
Joe: It's been so long, I forgot how terrifying it is to protect someone.
Euden: Joe...
Joe: Guess it's no wonder I was low on thrills, living just for myself.
Joe: You said you had a dream, right?
Euden: Yes. I want to build a kingdom where everyone can live in peace.
Euden: Elisanne, Cleo, Ranzal... You.
Joe: Heh heh... Not bad, as dreams go.
Joe: Whatever mine was, I forgot it years ago.
Joe: Maybe I'll just protect yours.
Joe: Really raises the stakes, having something to lose. Sounds...thrilling.
Joe: What do you say? Got room in your life for a guy like me at your side?
Euden: I've actually been saving a spot for you. Let's make this dream a reality together.